Wednesday, December 28, 2016

The celebrations continue......

So. That's it then. Christmas is done! All that remains are cold chunks of beef, crackers and what seems to be, a cheese shop in my fridge. We are all happily living off festive leftovers. I can hear the Good Man crunching his way through doritoes. Our normal three meals a day with shit loads of fruit diet, has gone out the window, and been replaced by a dead slack cavalier approach. Cake for breakfast? Why not? I convince myself that this is good, in a waste not want not stylee. The Little Man wants jelly, and I fancy a trifle.....not with sherry in mind you. Call me unsophisticated. But I am not a fan of alcohol in food. Alcohol in a glass. Food on a plate. And I don't think I'll ever have an appreciation for sherry, as it's disgusting.

As I was saying......Christmas is done. But what isn't done, is my birthday. My yearly celebration is wedged between Christmas and The New year. Some people loathe having their birthday so close to Christmas, but not me. I quite like it. We have people coming and going throughout the day and I'm really looking forward to it! Just don't enquire about my age. Ok?

Today is one of those days when I just can't get going. I'm still in my pit, with a hot chocolate and Badger stretched out behind me. I'm sure I'm the envy of most working people, with my lie ins and pj wearing lazy days. Although I'm sure no one envies the brain disease part of me. Zombies would not want my manky brain. But it's because of my manky brain that I've been able to afford the time to have the little man, and stay home with him. To be the one who's always here, not dashing about trying to do several things at once.

I remember an ms friend of mine that used to tell me to look for the gift. At the time I was still driving, swimming, yoga ing, body balancing and high heel wearing, and I couldn't see any gifts. I had relapsing remitting MS, and life for the most part was uninterrupted. I had blips where ms would rise up and bite me on the arse. And then, bit by bit, the life I had, that I thought made me ME, was eroded. First to go was the heels. No bother as I love converse too. And then the rest got chipped away, bit by bit. And I could only seem to think of myself in terms of 'I used to....' Well, that's like beating yourself over the head with a shitty stick. It took me a while to realise, that I'll always have the 'used to' part of me. That I could set it to one side, as I went about developing the new me. It took a while, but I'm now ok with how I am. Don't get me wrong, I do have the odd shit fit about it. I'm not a saint. But life is good. There are things I have ms to thank for......

And I never thought l'd say that. 

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Eat your weight in mince pies......

Well, today was non stop excitement. As we were meeting friends at a pub, we bundled ourselves into coats and the car. Transferring from the wheelchair to the car is a bit of a mission, as my legs seem to be giving up on the only job description they have, and are required to the bulk of my body as I stand for literally 5 seconds to twist and drop onto the car seat.

I've got this returner thing from physio people. It has a base I stand on, then I pull myself upright to standing. Which I can do, and Jesus wept! It feels so good to be standing up, and this never surprises me. Although, when I first started using it, The Little Man was surprised,
'Mummy!!? You're standing??' And as I haven't been a standing Mummy since he was tiny, it would have been a surprise. I laughed and said, 'Yes! Yes I am!' Honestly? My voice was a happy voice, and I was happy, but I could've cried, both sad and happy tears. I need to be using it to help strengthen my thighs.

So anyway back to the pub and meeting the friends that didn't turn up...we got the wrong's tomorrow. So back we'll go, it's a superb pub, so no hardship. Except to our waist lines as the food is quite spectacular. Still, it is Christmas, and we all are expected to eat the equivalent of our body weight in festive food. AKA pizza. See my Festive List blogpost....

So now it's the next day and meeting friends take 2. So far, I'm still in my pit with burning eyeballs. BUT, I have thought about what to wear, done a Facebook quiz had breakfast AND my advent chocolate. I just can't shift. Physically and mentally. Oh and I just remembered physio is here in a min....slight panic! Hopefully that will wake me up and I'm sure she won't care about seeing me in my pjs.

Twenty minutes later and physio done, so it's time to get ready and head out for a more successful meet up with friends. The pub was a lot busier today, so we squeezed round a table, and exchanged our gifts. No matter how long we talk for, there's always more to say and things forgotten to say.

My husband has taken it upon himself, to be the seasonal hunter/gatherer. Right now he can be found stalking his prey in Sainsbury's. And I can be relied upon to tackle a non stop avalanche of pine neddles. The tree is not near a radiator, and it's watered daily, but still continues to shed almighty amounts of fecking pin needles. I just found one on my pillow! WTF??

A friend that I've know for AGES was coming over tomorrow, but the poor girl has Norovirus. I had that a few years ago now, but I still shudder at the thought. I felt as though I was left an inside out shell of a person. And so attractive. The joy of winter bugs.

On that note, I'll love you and leave you.

Sunday, December 18, 2016

What comes first? The fridge/freezer or car? You can keep your chicken and eggs..I've nowhere to store them!!

Today is not the best day I've had. Well, it was part lush, but always with an undercurrent of MEH! In my extended family, we do secret Santa. And today is the day! But am I there? No....and have I been in a coma for most of the day? Yes I bloody well have! The person that bought for me, got the present to me, and it hit the spot! Someone that knows me well enough to know that the biggest ever chocolate bar, a large and beautiful yankee candle, and lush smelling body wash, and one of those puffy things, and it all hit the spot! So, missing out being there = meh! But facetiming and saying hi to the 19 family members = fantastic!! As does opening my present......thank you! Xx

I also answered the door earlier, to a food delivery, that my sister arranged to have sent to that was a Billy Bonus too! So whilst I'm feeling a bit grumpy about missing out, my family have still included me in their day's celebration and that scores highly on the happiness chart. My sister has a signature dish of a beautiful crunchy/chewy pavlova, and piled high with cream and raspberries; and as I couldn't be there to help devour it, there was a raspberry pavlova in the food delivery. I'm sure it won't be as good as my sisters, but sending and knowing my favourite stuff, scores very highly! Oh and there was a Dr Pepper too.
She could have got me a new and bigger fridge freezer though. It was a struggle to get it all in, and as I was placing/ramming things in, ice was  groaning and chipping. De-icing the freezer was probably not my sister's intention. I've been thinking for a while about a new and bigger fridge freezer......but as we need a new car too, I think I'd best forget it.

Still, Santa might deliver..........??.....


Tuesday, December 13, 2016

A festive list......

It's Friday, and weekend plans are looming........and wishing to carry out those plans, means I have to ignore the monster that is MS, always looming large in my life, whilst biting my back and snapping at my heels. I wish I could give it the slip, and it give me a break.
The two boys are bathed and ready for a story and then bed. Chrissie Hynde is doing her best to put some festive cheer into a song, and failing, as I tip myself into bed.

Weekend plan #1= pub lunch with friends. The festive lunch was ignored by each and every one of us, as we ordered pizzas. Three of us complained about being fatty fat fats, and then ordered pudding. One of us is a barely there person, so she can eat all the pudding she likes. Annoyingly.

Tomorrow the Christmas tree is going up. Apparently, it's already been bought, and is on the drive. The boys are dead excited about decorating the tree. The Good Man, less so, as he'll be scrabbling about in the loft for the decorations before we can start. Then it's over to daughter number threes for a Christmas meet up with my ex husbands family. I haven't seen them in ages. So long in fact, they haven't seen me in a wheelchair. So, that'll be odd. From my side, and theirs. Did you know that only about 8% of people with MS use a wheelchair? That's not a minority to envy.  Well, saying/typing that.......I hate being in a wheelchair, but I love what it enables me to do. And bingo wings will not develop whilst I'm self propelling. Every cloud n all that........

And then the Slightly Bigger Little Man goes home. But he is with us for four days over Christmas And The Little Man begins the wind down at school. So I'd better get on and help him do his cards. Another job for tomorrow.

Christmas CD back on.
Decorate tree.
Write the Little Man's cards.
Watch The Snowman.
See people.
Eat some quality crap.

So now it's Tuesday. Apart from The Snowman the list is sorted. I've also had a cut and colour, so at least my hair looks healthy, even if my face doesn't. Anyhoo, I doubt I'll write before Christmas, so Merry Christmas to you all! Xx

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Maggots and faggots.

For the last few days I've been feeling awful. So awful I can't really explain how I feel. But today, on more than one occasion, I managed to stop my husband in his tracks.......he then said the beautiful words that all girls long to hear......'Babe? You look wrecked.' And I swear that my eyes are working independently of each other. So this makes me feel heavenly......especially as I am also changing from one set of pjs into another clean, fresh pair. Clean and fresh I am not, but at least my pyjamas are. My hair has also formed a matted ball at the back of my head. And can I find my hairbrush? No. That's enough of me and my beauty tips......

Tomorrow I am planning on sorting the last bit of Christmas shopping. The Good Man is tricky....all his heart desires is a fire pit. And Amazon vouchers.......I think he doesn't trust my present buying. Voucher buying, the most romantic of gifts....for my one true love, is not happening. Fire pit it is then. And all my heart desires is a silver bangle I've seen. And yes, we both seem to have reached that age where we don't need ANYTHING. We are bloody lucky. Maybe I should ask for a hairbrush? The one I've lost is bright pink too, HOW has that gone missing?

The Little Man is gearing up for his schools nativity play thing. There are two performances, and he is starring as a shepherd. A non speaking part, but I bet he'll be the best shepherd I've ever seen.
Then his big brother is here for the weekend, and I think we'll get the tree. The boys will decorate it, and when they're in bed, I'll redo it, to space the decorations out. Otherwise the lower branches will be heavy with baubles, and bare upper branches.

A few people have been ringing/texting to see when we are about for a meet up. And people are what make or break a good time......Christmas or not. I found my Christmas was presumed lost until the other day. So I'll but that on and sing about scumbags maggots and cheap lousy faggots, and crack open the Baileys. Joyeux Noel!

Sunday, December 4, 2016

It's 11pm here, and all is quiet. The Good Man took The Little Man to his school friends today, to help him decorate their Christmas tree. Unfortunately I couldn't go, as MS was being a bell end. I like to get a real tree, about a week before Christmas. And then two weeks is enough for me, to have a tree in my lounge. Having a tree in your house = lovely, but it's a bit odd, if you think about it. I like the minimal approach to Christmas decorations.....less is more n all that. And tinsel gets a big fat no from me. This may change over time, that is if the little man has his way.......he is taking a firm view, that a pink tree is the way to go. Pink trees are not prolific in nature, and seeing that the pink trees are made of's not happening. In fact, my hands feel a little sweaty at the thought..... So a compromise......The Little Man having a mini mini pink tree in his bedroom. And I'm getting some pale pink baubles for the real tree. And d'you know what? I'm getting a bit excited now......I wrap lights and fat fake ivy around the banisters, have a willow twig reindeer outside by the front door, put stockings up, (not mine) and I'm done. Then Christmas Eve sees Santa leave snowy footprints up the statues, to leave treats outside bedroom doors. Again, it's a bit weird to have a strange man go in your bedroom, my girls didn't like to think of a strange man creeping in to their bedroom. And to be honest I saw their point. So I would make up gift bags of sweets, and a mini can of drink, to leave outside their bedroom door. And yes, Santa and Rudolph were thanked with a carrot and a mince pie.

I just have The Good Man and my niece to get for, then I'm done present wise. Anyhoo, that's enough Christmas chit chat. Actually, no it's not. The wrapping extravaganser (? spelling??) will take a bit of time. I don't mind this actually, in fact I quite enjoy it! Back during my first marriage, I'd go and wrap all of my husbands presents. One year they bought me the sellotape dispenser that you wore on the back of your hand. It was the first time I'd ever used one and it was bloody marvellous! Thank you Betty. Thank you Tom! (Blowing a kiss heavenwards).

One of my girls is having a get together with her Dads family, and she has asked me to go. They were my family once upon a time too, and it would be nice to go and see everyone. They'll be seeing the new improved (?) wheelchair me, and whilst they won't give a shit, I will. And I won't too. BUT, I am having my hair done the day shiny new hair will hopefully dazzle them.

All my girls will be there too (I think) and so will my grandson and my granddaughter. Fuck! Just typing that makes me feel antiquated. But they're beautiful, and cheeky, so that helps. Right! So tomorrow, we need to gather our decorations, and remind ourselves of what we have. Oooh, I think I'll put a little tree by the front door too. My minimalist decorating takes planning you know ;)

Speak soon Xx